You wouldn’t believe it, the singer says. At that moment preparing for her comeback record in eight years, blissfully happy with her current love, and finally the parent to a young child after struggling to conceive for ten years, riding high. Suddenly in spring she was found to have cancer in her breast.
The musician, birth name Jessica Cornish, is renowned for being brutally honest. The LP, the provocatively titled album, was intended as an candid account, tackling every moment of pain she’d experienced since she last recorded music (a gynecological condition, pregnancy loss, broken romances, gaslighting, suicidal thoughts) with typical candour. The lead track, No Secrets, was dropped in the spring. But by then there was a mighty secret. Her diagnosis. Then follow-up track, Living My Best Life, was released in late spring and Cornish was speaking publicly about how she was enjoying life to the fullest, while still secretly dealing with breast cancer. Four weeks after she disclosed her condition, and in early July she underwent breast removal surgery.
She gives me her best “Are you kidding?” look. “I release with a song called the track No Secrets. I’m doing every media appearance, and they inquire, ‘What’s happening?’ and I respond, ‘Erm, yeah, nothing …’” Cornish has just had to postpone shows because she’s still waiting for reconstructive surgery.
We’re at a photography studio in the capital. She is sporting a tan faux-leather coat, jeans with elaborate white patches, beige footwear and oversized specs. Picture biker chic meets 70s singer aesthetic. “I feel like I’m in the 1970s and I should have a boyfriend with a big tache.” Like the film, I say, referencing the picture. “That’s what people called me at school!” She smiles. Cornish is quick, unfiltered and blunt. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is planning to attempt her initial standup show soon. “I enjoy humor. On stage I frequently joke about the crowd.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
Cornish was preparing for an performance at the Baftas when she noticed an abnormality. “I promptly visited to get it examined, had an scan, and they said, ‘It seems benign; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I responded, ‘But I can feel it. My arm hurts and tingling in my hands whenever I wake up.’ And they suggested, ‘We should biopsy it?’ It happened on March 28, the day after my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was concerning she’d reach out on the start of the week. By then she had convinced herself it was nothing. The way she tells it, it was simply too inconvenient to receive a diagnosis when she had so much on.
“We’re two weeks away from launching this thing after eight years without an album and no new music. And she contacted me and said, ‘Is six okay?’ And I thought, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I join the call thinking it’s all going to be good, and she goes, ‘Are you sitting down?.’ The solemn tone? And she says, ‘I’m so, so sorry but your reports have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” What was your reaction? “I answered, ‘Well, that’s not great. The timing is terrible.’ My initial thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
Some men find me challenging due to my self-awareness
She found the surgery terrifying and absurd. “I dislike anesthesia. They walk you down. You know when you have emergency surgery you roll down in a bed, but then I just marched with a gown on and my bum hanging out. You feel like you’re in an episode of Black Mirror.” But, Cornish says, she’s been lucky. Without chemo or radio, just the procedure. “It’s terrible, but yet Luckily it was detected early. I underwent removal four months ago and my affected breast now looks like a grapefruit under a tight bedsheet.” Another grin. “At least the nipple remains.”
The subsequent surgery is both medical and cosmetic. Her breasts, she notes, are now “uneven. The size doesn’t match. So inconsiderate! I thought, don’t add insult to injury, I’m already having a difficult experience. How offensive! Ironically I said I’d never get my boobs done because I’ve got obsessive tendencies, and I know they’d never be flawless. Cancer ruined that plan.”
A History of Health Challenges
Cornish is familiar with health problems. She thinks her attitude toward illness has been so optimistic because she’s experienced in physical challenges. Frequently they align with peak moments, acting as a reminder, or punch in the stomach, to remind her not to assume everything is fine. “Truly, I feel life goes, ‘Enjoying yourself? Hold on.’ Since childhood, it has often paired with high points for me; a serious or unusual issue has impacted my body.”
She takes me back to her 11-year-old self, already beginning performing in the London theater in a musical (she was chosen at the age of nine). That’s when she was diagnosed with the heart condition WPW, which can cause a tachycardia as well as dizziness and heart flutters. “I attended rehearsals intermittently on an drip, and returning to the hospital at night.” She skips forward several years, and teenage Jess has become part of the female band the group while studying at the academy. “I secured a deal, and I had a stroke. Then when I was ready to debut in recently I had a collision and my voice box shifted and I couldn’t sing for a long period.”
Hey, I say, slow down, I am overwhelmed. A stroke so young? She nods|agrees
